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I have three fabulous children and a terrific husband. I was recently laid off and have decided to try the stay-at-home gig. We'll see how it goes!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Updated Pro List

Eight months in and I think it's time to update the Pros to being a SAHM list.

Pros to being a Stay-at-home mom (as written in February):

1 - More sleep!  We won't have to wake the children as early, so I can get to work on time.  The kids get more sleep and are then less cranky... maybe.

Well, this is somewhat true.  I do get to stay up later; which I like, but there really isn't much more sleep for me.  If I want to have a shower before 2PM, it seems my only option is to get up by 6:30AM.  That's almost an hour and a half later than when I was working, so not bad.  There is more sleep for the kids which is wonderful because they are much better behaved when they are properly rested.

2 - More 'time'!  I can pick our oldest up from school and get her homework done BEFORE 5PM, so we have more time to play with our kids.

This does seem to be true.  My daughter's homework does get done within 30 minutes of being home which is great.  However, with my being home we have decided that she could participate in more activities.  That just means I'm running her and the others around more, which does not leave much time to play.  Our oldest is officially over-scheduled and we're working on reducing her extracurricular activities.

3 - Less illness!  Not being in daycare may keep our son from getting sick as often and hopefully keep the baby from getting sick... at least for a while.

This has proven to be absolutely true.  Our son was just one strep throat away from having his tonsils removed and since he left day care (knock on wood) he has been strep free!  The baby has had a few colds, which I expect with an older sibling in school, but nothing serious.  It's been wonderful.

4 - Less stress for me!  I am under no illusions that being a SAHM is easy, however, just knowing I'm getting close to my last day of work has already helped me to relax and feel less rushed.  This in turn, has had a positive effect on my kid's attitudes.  My husband also travels a lot, so being home would put less stress on me and kids when he's out of town.

This is absolutely true..... kind of.  I do feel great being away from work.  I did not realize just how bad it was until I left.  However, because I am a crazy type A, moderate control freak, I have had some control issues at home.  My husband travels a lot, so I am a virtual stay at home mom at least a week a month.  And when he's gone everything is done my way.  That makes it really difficult to allow my husband to contribute.  Since I am now the primary care giver, I want things MY way, and that's not right.  He is the dad and the husband and should have at least some say as to how things are done.  I am grateful that he is a husband and father who is involved, it's difficult, however, to view the home as anything but 'my turf'.  If we're going to make it through this time of transition I have to give up my alpha tendencies and let him participate.  It is his family too, after all.

5 - No more commuting!  We'll save money on gas!  I won't get stuck in traffic jams!  No more dealing with less than perfect drivers!

All I have to say about this is, Hallelujah!!!!!!!!

6 - Open toed shoes!  The job I've had for the last 6 years has not allowed me to wear open toed shoes.  No cute sandals or peep toes; just comfortable, reliable shoes.  Now I can wear any shoe I want, when I want!!!  I can even go barefoot.

This was awesome, for about week.  I developed very painful heal spurs and plantar fasciitis during pregnancy, so my shoe-wear has been limited.  I am also waiting until I lose all the baby weight before I splurge on new shoes.  Hopefully the problems with my feet and weight will resolve around the same time.

7 - No marathon cleaning!  Since I'll be at home I can get parts of the house cleaned everyday and won't have to spend several hours every Saturday trying to get the house to a respectable state.

Wow was I kidding myself!  It is true that I can work on different parts of the house on different days and many Saturdays have been free.  However, it is incredibly difficult to find more than 20 minutes at a time during the day to do anything.  It usually takes me until lunch to clean up the breakfast dishes.  Granted, I am playing with the kids and attempting to teach my son during that time, but I still feel like I should be able to get more done.  I'm not sure where the time goes.  I'm not watching TV or painting my nails or anything.  I feel like the "To Do" list keeps getting longer and I'm making no progress.  I'm not sure how that's possible when I don't work, but it's true.

New Pros to being a SAHM:

8 - I know my kids.  And I mean really know them.  I've had the chance to really talk to my oldest and find out what she likes, dislikes, is afraid of and just who she is.  I've been able to spend some wonderful time with my son while he's transitioned from toddler to kid and I've been able to cherish the first few months with our youngest with no looming deadline to return to work.

9 - I have been able to help people.  I can run errands for people who are sick, or watch their kids for them, or just be around to talk to people when they need some one.  It's been great.  I don't feel like I'm sacrificing time with my family to do good.  And as an added benefit, my kids come with me and are hopefully learning to do the same.

This is just the tip of the ice burg.  I'm sure I'll find more pros as time goes on.

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