My last day of work!

This is my first blog!  I am very excited to see where this leads and hopefully I don't bore too many people in the process.

The idea for this blog is to chronicle my life as I adjust from being a working mom of two (almost three kids) to a stay-at-home mom.  The decision to be a SAHM (an acronym I have recently learned) was not entirely my own; hence the title The Unplanned Housewife.  The decision was made for me by a department that decided that although I was valuable to them, they could no longer afford me.  In today's economy that's just the way things work.

So how did I reach the decision to be a SAHM?  My husband and I have given it a lot of thought.  We weighed the pros and cons and decided it would be best for our family for me to stay home, at least for a while.  It has not been an easy decision and I cannot say that we have finalized anything.  The fact is, I am seven months pregnant and there is no real point in trying to find a job right away when shortly after being hired (assuming some one would hire me) I would go on maternity leave.  We are blessed to not have to worry too much about our financial situation, so it is not like I need to get a job to keep our household afloat.  We will have to adjust our spending habits, but we're not going to lose our house or have to eat Ramen and Mac&Cheese every night.

Today was my last day at work.  At first, everything was pretty uncomfortable really.  I didn't have too much to do and everyone seemed to be avoiding me and didn't want to look at me.  I am not very comfortable being the center of attention, so I guess that's a good thing.  As the day went on people seemed to relax a bit.  Turns out my co-workers planned a surprise good-bye party.  It was a lot of fun.  Leaving the lab was difficult.  I had to say goodbye to everyone and I spent a few minutes just looking at my desk.  It was quite surreal thinking I wouldn't be coming back.  I finally made it to my car and I took another moment before leaving the parking lot just to soak in the moment.  I managed to drive away without any tears.  Fortunately, any sadness I was feeling was quickly dissipated by the rush hour traffic I had to make my way through to get home. Ahhh the peace that comes with knowing I won't have to do that again!

Anyway, I digress.  The two toughest parts of my day today were dropping off and picking up our son from his daycare.  Today was his last day and for whatever reason I found it very difficult to say goodbye.  We've had our kids in Primrose for over 5 years.  We have always felt our children were loved and well cared for; not to mention well educated.  It was very hard to watch him say goodbye to his friends and teachers.  I know he's really too young to be upset, but I'm sad for him.  He won't get to play with his friends everyday and now he is going to have to learn from me.  I have a PhD and have taught many classes, but I am in no way qualified to teach a 2 year old his A,B,Cs.  That will be an adventure all in itself.

So all in all today has been an awkward day.  I've been sad, happy, relieved, angry and excited.  Some of that may have something to do with pregnancy hormones, most of however, is not.  A good friend of mine told me I need to make sure I grieve the loss of my work.  It has been a very large part of my life and now I have to let it go.  While I will maintain the friendships I have made I won't get to see the wonderful people I have called my co-workers for the last six years.  We have shared good times, tough times, funny times and literally ALL the embarrassing moments of our lives.  At least I hope it's all, they are some C-R-A-Z-Y people and I will truly miss seeing them almost everyday.

As another friend of mine has told me, it's not the end, but the beginning.  I am entering the next phase of my life and while I'm nervous about what's ahead I'm sure it will be an adventure!